Well I made it through my 3 day fast with only a couple no no’s. Friday I had two bites of my son’s sandwich. Saturday I had a bite of rice with meat and one bite of corn. Then yesterday I had half a wheat roll and ended up getting sick from it. Boy that was loads of fun. However on the plus side I did take the six pounds off and one extra so now comes where I am supposed to go back to eating, and I will… eventually. I woke up this morning starving so I had a roll and a few bites of my son’s breakfast. Nothing spectacular but defiantly enough to make my stomach happy and shut it up. However I have no actual desire to eat. I’m not hungry, I have loads of energy, I am not feeling loopy or out of it by any means. So I guess once the hunger pains start I will go get something. Then again I may want to wait until tonight just incase my stomach decides food isn’t what it wants! When I do eat I am going to have to take it light and not have anything too heavy. It has been a few days since I felt any fullness and I am thinking that when I do I am not going to like it. On top of all that my tummy is not feeling very strong this morning. Sort of like a mini stomach bug and no this has nothing to do with the fast. Hopefully it won’t get too bad and I can go back to normal in the next couple days. And once again for those who read this journal and may get a bit worried, I am fine. As much as I thank you for it, I really would appreciate it if you didn’t worry so much. No matter how many times you tell me this isn’t good for me, or tell me that I need to eat it comes down to the fact that I do not enjoy food. I do not like feeling full or sluggish from food and I will eat it when I need to but only then. I am not unhealthy (according to my doctors) I am not at risk of malnutrition or any other weird side effect. I am not anorexic (as my size can happily state to you), I don’t have an insane fear of food , I am just quirky. I take daily vitamins, drink plenty of juice and water and get plenty of sleep most of the time. My blood sugar isn’t dropping, my blood pressure is still a bit high but nothing dangerous, I am not dizzy, exhausted or anything like it. I am perfectly well, I am not killing myself, I am not unhappy because of this. Now you can tell me that in time this will take it’s toll on me, but so will being overweight and depressed because of it. I have in the past taken this to the edge of insanity (seriously) and turned it around when I needed to. I am nowhere as bad as I was then. I am just sick of stuffing my face to make everyone around me happy and make them stop their worry. This is who I am, this is what I am and as long as I am not binging on loads then I am not trying to stop myself from constantly getting sick, so yeah I trade one beast for the other but at least this is the less deadly one. So don't try to force feed me or make me feel like I'm nothing because I don't have normal eating habits like some people. Don't make me feel like a child in need of guidance. Either be my friend and treat me like a normal human or don't, either way I will be fine. Aside from that my weekend was full of laundry and cleaning. Finishing another blanket for one of my nieces and starting on the pillow. Aside from that life was normal. :D

There are no comments to this entry.